One day not too long ago, I was driving the kids somewhere (probably to soccer practice) and Max started telling me all about this Nintendo DSI that he wants. Now, you might have guessed that we’re not big video game people. (And you’d be right!) We have a Wii, but we only play it maybe once a month for half an hour. So you can imagine how this conversation went in my head (in case you can’t imagine it, here’s what I was thinking):
Max “Mom! I want to get a Nintendo DSI! They’re awesome.”
Me “Yeah… not happening.”
Max “But all my friends have them!”
Me “I don’t care. You’re not getting one.”
Insert angry kid.
Instead, I decided to use it as a teaching moment. Because Josh and I are finding more and more, that this lifestyle of just buying all kinds of stuff we don’t need doesn’t really suit us. Instead of spending our hard earned money on stuff, we want to spend it DOING things with the people we love. And we want our kids to be on board with that too.
So instead of flat out telling Max he couldn’t get a DSI, I steered the conversation in a different direction. I first asked him WHY he wanted a DSI in the first place. He told me that all his friends had them. Instead of telling him why that shouldn’t matter, I empathized with him. We all know what it’s like to want something just because other people have it. Right? (Tell me I’m not alone here).
The next thing we did was look up how much it would cost to buy a DSI and a couple of games (about $200). And then we spent the next five minutes or so coming up with all the different things we could do with $200 instead of buying a DSI. The kids got really into this part! Here’s what we came up with…
$200 would:
pay for 2 days of a family road trip
get our whole family in to Worlds of Fun and buy us lunch
pay for one round trip plane ticket to California (well, almost!)
get us 13 trips to get frozen yogurt
pay for our family to see 5 matinee movies including popcorn AND candy
To bring my point home, I reminded the kids of the Leapsters they had when they were little. I spent about $700 on those stupid things… by the time I bought 3 consoles, 2 bags, extra batteries, 8 million games, etc. I asked them if they could go back in time and choose a family road trip instead of Leapsters… what would they choose…
Believe it or not, all three of my kids said they would choose the family road trip over the Leapsters. Boy did that feel like a win! So in the end, we decided together that Max wouldn’t get a DSI. And that sure feels like a win. I can’t promise that if I offered to buy him a DSI tomorrow that he would turn it down in lieu of a family trip, but I do know that he understood my point. And he wasn’t upset about not getting the game. And hopefully he understands a little more about money and opportunity costs.
How do you teach your kids to value experiences over things?
